The Western Value: Equality – Is At The Heart Of A Strong And Stable Society
In almost any modern Western country, whether it’s European, North American, or Australian, people are raised to believe that everyone is basically equal – that no one is “better” than anybody else. In other words, they are born “equal,” and how they live their lives can affect their level of power, status, or wealth. And equality is “right” and “good.” It’s at the heart of a strong, stable society. Even in older European cultures like Great Britain where there’s still a rich and powerful monarchy people still think of themselves as equal, knowing they can influence their own level of power, status, or wealth by educating themselves, working hard, and moving freely within the limits of their society.
As a matter of fact, Western cultures tend to believe that whenever there is inequality in society it is a problem to be dealt with – through laws, regulations, and education – so that the value of equality is maintained and all people are treated equally (at least on the surface).
In your culture, it’s likely that the “power gap” between the rich or privileged and the regular guy is small – even though there are always people with more privilege, wealth and power than others.
For example, Phil knows that his sister is his equal. He knows that Lia is his sister’s equal. He’s therefore startled – even shocked – that Lia would intentionally put herself in a subservient position to his sister and NOT treat her as an equal! He’s also a bit disgusted that his sister seems to be enjoying a “power trip” over Lia – even though she laughs it off as a lark. But there’s more to this “power dynamic” than that.
In your relationship with a Thai woman, you will be assigned the role of “more powerful”– not only because of your unique status as a foreigner (or “farang”) but also because in Thai society, men have more power than women. They are the head of the family. That’s just the way it is. You might be uncomfortable in this position, having had more experience with Western women who are used to asserting themselves, participating in decision- making, and standing up for themselves as equals.
And if you get too uncomfortable, you’ll want to talk about it and resolve it as equals. Why? Because in your culture, when something needs to change, people get together and discuss the situation as equals until a solution evolves. The discussions might get loud or boisterous, but when a change needs to happen, it’s usually accomplished through “evolution” – that is, without violence.
In your culture, you might feel uncomfortable “throwing your weight around” with all the trappings of power, no matter what your position or job title. It’s just bad manners to flaunt your status in most Western countries.
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